


Richard Tozier. Professional Dumbass.

by barneybees



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti)
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-24
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:08:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25351417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/barneybees/pseuds/barneybees
Summary: Richie sacrifices himself for Eddie after watching all of the losers die , but Eddie was the one he saw die over and over.The losers don't leave him.FUCK STEPAN KONGE!
Relationships: Ben Hanscom/Beverly Marsh, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Kudos: 18





	1. Change it.

**Author's Note:**

> IM SORRY IN ADVANCE

There's a blinding light and the last coherent thought he has of the real world is holy fuck that's a lot of sharp teeth. Then he's floating and gone to the world where absolute hell has broken loose all because Mike lied to them to get them back for this bullshit. This absolute fuckery, and now he was going to die for him. A fair trade but still. A 'hey man come back to Derry to die for one of us losers!' Would have been nice to have a headsup theres a fucking killer clown after us. 

Then there's the sensation of falling and he lands hard. Eddie pretty much dies first on top of him and then for real in his arms. No amount of scrubbing will ever get the blood off his hands. No amount of brushing his teeth will ever get his best friends blood out of his mouth. His best friend, fucking dead and gone because he tried to protect someone else.

They just leave him even with Richie having a mental breakdown trying to process that Eddie is dead hes dead hes dead HES DEAD AND THEY LEFT HIM. He makes it back to LA. He drinks heavily in the world where Eddie's dead. Dodges texts and calls and yeah maybe he does do enough blow that he pretty much Scarfaced one session. 

\-----

White light.

Then he's falling.

Eddie gets torn apart.

\-----

White light.

Falling.

Bev gets decapitated. Ben drags her body out in HIS grief. Richie tries not to be bitter because he can fucking remember what he saw in the dead lights. Different Ben but still what good are all those muscles for when it's only convenient for him ?

\-----

White light.

Falling.

Ben is cut in half by one of its claws. They leave him. Mike dies with the house crushing him as it comes down. 

They lose Stan Mike and Ben. The losers club is broken apart. Richie goes home and drinks. 

\----

White light

Falling.

A giant Georgie crushes Bill with his foot.

\-----

White light.

Falling with a crunch.

Mike dies and Richie can't make it out either, they all stay. They all die.

\-----

White light. Falling. Stan! Stan is here with them and Bev was right when she said like you but older because Stan hasn't changed. He weeps and grabs his arm. He's real he's here. They all make it out. They all need fucking therapy but hey alive! Thats good? Thats good right?

\----

White light.

Falling.

The claw goes through Eddie's skull and this time he dies on top of him. Richie doesn't move and breaks down weeping and clutching Eddie with his eyes squeezed shut because if he doesn't look then the gore resting on his shoulder can't get to him. Pennywise knows. He knows and stabs Eddie through the back and through Richie wiggling the claw before Richie chokes on his blood.

\-----

White light. He falls and his right leg definitely breaks, and his head bounces off the ground. Eddie's over him.... And through the pain Richie manages to flip them in time. He can feel the claw tear clean through his right ribs and he laughs blood splattering on Eddie's face, and he tries to wipe it off. His blood looks wrong on Eddie. Pennywise tears him away and he's ragdolling through the air.

The first bounce into the cave definitely breaks his left arm and he bounces again before rolling to a stop face down. The pain is unreal edging nearer to the point that it isn't even registering anymore. That cant be good he thinks digging his fingers into the ground trying to get up.

He laughs as the others turn him over choking on the blood that he cant swallow. He's against the wall and he knows he's fading fast. Something presses against the wound and he winces, fingers tangling with the blur... Eddie's fingers. He can feel the wedding ring cementing the fact Eddie will never love him back the way he loves Eddie. Eddie is talking but Richie cant process it. Black is creeping into his edges and he's sure that he lost his glasses in the fall because he can't see a thing. Except the blurs he knows are his friends.

They move him and he has to rest. This is how They left Eddie he thinks. Fingers tightening in Eddie's sweatshirt, he makes up his mind. He's dying anyway.

"Eds." There's a blood gush from his mouth, and he tries to swallow the rest. "Eddie."

"What?" Eddie doesn't exactly snap but Richie knows it's the situation stressing him out. Him dying is the right thing. Has he made peace with it? Of course. There's no use begging for his life when they can get out. As long as his friends are safe he doesn't care.

"Eddie , you know I-I...." He swallows and grins. " I love you. Like in love with you." Nothing will beat that joke Eddie made in that other world. "I carved our initials on the kissing bridge when we were still kids." He knows the others are fighting. Eddie should be too. " Go. Avenge me." He laughs and swallows harshly trying not to cough up more blood.

How much blood can someone lose anyway? He feels like he's bled out enough for two people at this point and he's dizzy he's so dizzy. And the world is dimming faster than he thought it would. He didn't know it would feel like this. That dying is just fading and being cold. He's so fucking cold. It's taking one of them with it after all, and he's glad it's him and not his friends. They have lives. They all have lives to get back to. What does he have? 

Coke. Alcohol. Weed. A big empty house with rooms with nothing in them. A failing comedian that's alone telling someone else's jokes, because no one likes gay comedy in this day and age apparently. 

He's got nothing. He is nothing. 

He feels Eddie leave. He definitely can't see anymore but this is worth it. He can hear them yelling but it's fading like the sound has traveled through water to reach his ears. He closes his eyes too tired to keep them open. He doesn't give a fuck if they leave him. Get out safely. That's all he wants. If he could get up and shove them out of this hell hole he would. 

Seeing Stan is the last thought he has before its a big fat cut to black. 


	2. Living Is Hard.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> :o)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :o)c

As much as he wants to say the annoying noise woke him up, it was the dull ache through his whole body. That's what hits him first. He hurts. Everywhere. The disinfectant nightmare breaking past the tubes in his nose and the fact there's tubes in his nose is the next thing he notices after trying to wipe at his face. Eyes open slowly to drift over the blurry machines next to the bed, the IV drip that's pumping... something into his body, the ceiling that has a what he hopes is a water stain. His eyes land on the chair by the bed that has a coat in it. He wonders if it is his manager's coat, fuck he needs to call his manager. A soft groan and he attempts sitting up but it hurts and he clutches his stomach. 

He whines softly. Did he get hit by a truck? He knows he's in a hospital. He knows he's hurt. How he got here isn't coming back or why , but he's scared and the machine picks up on the fear his heart rate spiking. He needs to get out of here. There's an overwhelming urgency with the thought that people are in trouble.

He can see a blur rush into the room and grab his arm he tenses and tries to get away but the hand moves to his chest and he stills pain ripping through his middle. "Yeah dumbass. Stay still and I'll get a nurse to make sure you didn't tear your stitches out."

He tries to reply, tries to ask who the fuck this guy is and why he's in a hospital but his mouth feels like it's packed with sand. The blur leaves and he's out again.

\---

The same irritating noise, but this time he feels like fluid pooled and dripping over the sides of the bed. He tries to move his hand but it meets hair and he stills running his fingers over the head pressed against his thigh. His arm is in a cast, and that tugs at some memory that isn't quite clear enough to place.

There's a groan and the person lifts his head looking at him, he's close enough to see bambi peepers grow wider and a smile. "Hey you. Need water?"

Richie can feel himself nod and then why he's here hits him and he struggles to sit up. "Hey hey no none of that. Relax Richie. It's okay. I'm okay. The other losers are okay. We're all okay." It's Eddie the blur is Eddie. He chokes on the sob that tears from him as he relaxes against the bed, trying to grab at Eddie's shirt to know he's real that he's really safe. Eddie carefully sits on the bed with a cup of water, holding it up to his mouth so he can drink. Richie squeezes his knee between two fingers why the fuck couldn't Eddie sit on the other side with his good arm? 

It's the best water he's ever had, and he sips greedily before Eddie takes it away setting it on the floor. "You're okay?" His voice sounds softer and weaker than he's ever heard it before. Eddie snickers and grabs his casted arm lifting it so he can scoot against his side and lay down with him. Richie keeps his arm hoveeing above Eddie unsure if he's allowed to touch him, but he relaxes enough to rest it on Eddie's side. "We've been worried about you. Bev's still shaken up about you being an absolute idiot. You could have rolled us out of the way instead of doing this to yourself."

Richie can't move over he knows he can't and he wants this to be real. He desperately wants this to be real but Eddie wouldn't crawl into his hospital bed. Eddie definitely wouldnt be pressed up against him breaking hospital rules, and potentially harming him by pulling at tubes or whatever else he has hanging off of him. "I'm still there aren't I? We're still fighting it." His voice shakes, and he curls his arm tighter around Eddie. 

Eddie pinches his chest with a huff, earning a groan from Richie. "You're in the hospital because you saved my life. You died twice on the way here---" Eddie's voice cracks and he curls closer, placing his hand on Richie's upper chest. He runs his thumb over the fabric of the pale blue hospital gown over Richie's heart trying to steady himself before he continues . Richie is still wrestling with the fact Eddie wouldnt do this. "--- and once on the operating table. I'm tired Rich. I keep thinking we're going to lose you and I can't close my eyes without seeing ---" He presses his face into Richie's shoulder. " --- and the blood ... Your blood....I can still taste it and I've brushed my teeth like twenty times." Eddie sniffles and wipes at his eyes with his palm. "I'm tired. Can we sleep?" Those eyes look up at him and Richie swears his heart might leap from his chest. 

Richie just sort of stares at Eddie for a moment and then hums softly. "Whatever You say dream Eddie. Just stay a bit longer." He feels horrible that his blood got in Eddie's mouth he knows what that feels like. "Hey. Don't cry over me Eds. I did what I did because I lived it in the deadlights when it happened to you. I saw It tear all of you apart but it knew. It knew and it showed me over and over... Go to sleep Spaghetti. I'm not going anywhere. What am I going to do? Drag myself out of bed and crawl with one arm and leg? I'm stuck here buddy. No where Id rather be at the moment than curled in this hospital bed with you, except maybe in my own bed. It's king sized, and slightly more comfortable than this. Plenty of room to cuddle with me, my fifty pillows and my horrible morning breath."

He gets Eddie to laugh and he's happy. They lay in silence until Richie can feel Eddie relax against him and his breathing evens out. Richie however fights sleeping to watch Eddie breathe trying to match it. He can't breathe deeply and it's mildly concerning but he'll ask about it tomorrow.... Whenever they wake up. Richie's calmer now but he died? Finding out you died is supposed to alarm someone right? Richie knows he's rolling on pain meds and he is tired. It takes him an hour of watching Eddie's breathing before he drifts off.


	3. Living is hard: the sequel.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> :o)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :o) things will get interesting soon.

Another day of waking up to that g-d awful noise, but this time it's joined by this nails on a chalkboard sound of wheezing activating his Eddie can't breathe panic button. He opens his eyes to red hair looking down at him. "Bev?" He sounds weaker, why is he laying down?

"Hey Richie. You feeling okay? The doctors had to put a fancy mask on you to help you breathe better. Eddie's request before he went home." She smoothes some of the hair away from Richie's face. "Fix your face Rich. He'll be back before you leave, he just had some things to take care of."

Richie frowns brows furrowing as he looks over at her. "He didn't say bye. Why can't I breathe?" Bev looks sad for a moment then puts on a smile. "You had reconstructive surgery on you ribs when the doctors managed to save half of your lung. It might need to be removed at a later time depending on the process of recovery, but they say you are doing great so far. They made it sound smarter." Richie laughs softly enjoying the hand in his hair.

" Where's handsome? Not that you aren't lovely and beautiful, but I was hoping to be awoken by the man on the cover of romance novels, or Bambi Kaspbrak. Are all the attractive men we knew when we ran off the cliff in our undies gone? We should go do that when I get out of here. Give both Eddie and my manager an aneurysm at my carelessness, and lack of self preservation jumping into filthy water with .... I'm assuming I have many open wounds to go with my broken limbs?"

Bev sighs moving the chair closer, kicking her socked feet up on the bed, grabbing his hand to hold it carefully avoiding the IV. "Ben is at the townhouse cleaning up our rooms, Mike is packing up what he plans on taking for his long overdue trip. Bill is swinging by on his way out of town to say bye. I leave tomorrow with Ben to begin the divorce process. Unless you need someone to stay here until Eddie comes back. Is there someone we can call?"

Richie shakes his head curling slightly to look up at her. "Mmn. I need to call my manager tell him he still has a job and to come get me. You all have lives to get back to. Don't let me being in the ICU stop you from living. I did this so all of you could live. Could you get the doctor or a nurse to tell me what the fuck is going on so I know when I can go home. I miss my bed." 

Beverly nods and slips out of the room, only for a nurse to come in and sit by his bed. " Mr. Tozier I see you're awake after our scare last night. Beverly asked me to tell you what all we did to save you. Your right ribs have been reconstructed. You may experience tenderness on that side until you're healthy enough for exercises to rebuild strength. Your left arm is broken, and you had to have stitches for a gash in your shoulder. Your right leg is broken in two places. Upper and lower leg. You have a concussion and major bruising along the back of the skull. We saved half of your right lung. You had several blood transfusions. You have some nasty bruising along your body that should fade within a few weeks, our main concern is the purplish bruising along your back and the base of your spine. You might have some difficulty walking, sitting or laying down until everything heals properly. You have three broken fingers on your left hand , and your big toe on your right foot is broken as well. You have drainage tubes for the fluid in your lung that will need to be removed next week. I suppose someone told you that you died three times?" Richie nods trying to process everything. "We have a trauma survivor specialiat if you need someone to talk go." Richie shakes his head. "Pain meds? I'm hurting at a level that's easing into unbearable." The man nods and goes to the door. "I'm Jimmy. Sylvia will be in in a moment to give you your next dose. Get some rest Mr. Tozier you have recovering to do. Hopefully you get to go home in two weeks."

Richie stares up at the ceiling lost in thought until he drifts back off into darkness.

\----

All of the losers pile into his room to say goodbye huging Richie one by one until they leave. Alone. Richie hates being alone. It reminds him that there has been a six person shaped hole in his life for far too long, and its only been twenty minutes since they left. 

He calls his manager, staring at his duffle bag while he suffers the wrath of Steve. He has to hold the phone away from his ear at one point when Steve starts yelling. After two hours of yelling at him Steve knows he's in the hospital and plans on driving to meet him with Richie's assistant Monica so she can drive the rental car back to New York, while they drive to LA. There is no way he's healthy enough to get on a plane with half a lung.

\----

The days blend into a week, and then into two weeks. During the two weeks, he had the drainage tubes removed and got stitched up for that. He was under observation for infection and now wouldnt be able to leave for another week. 

\-----

Fingers run through his hair and Richie whines softly scrunching up his nose. "Mmn. Steve isn't touchy feely. Is this Bev or my Eddiekins?" The hand stills for a moment then goes back to running through his hair. "Rest Cheesy. They're releasing you to me in the morning. I told them I'd take you to the nearest hospital if anything happens." Richie hums softly and reaches blindly for the hand in his hair pulling it to over his heart. "Name puns! Who are you and what did you do with Eds?"

Eddie rolls his eyes and moves closer to the bed. "I found a spare pair of glasses in your bag and bought a pair of shorts that will be way too big on you to get them over the cast. I guessed your size for underwear and I got you a comfy sweatshirt that you're going to get lost in, but it's for the cast too." Richie hums in response too tired to actually hold a conversation about clothes. "Thank you Eds." Eddie just goes back to running his hand through Richie's hair holding the other carefully. 


	4. Road trip Baby!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> My friend told me to live my dreams and be mean to Richie, but I chickened out and wanted him to be happy instead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He's fineish. Just left over trauma from the dead lights. 
> 
> Big vomit tw and some nasty vomit involving maggots. It's a brief hallucination but he still puked so I just want y'all safe mmmkay 
> 
> I love you! Drink some water!

The sound of the machines is gone but the chaos of trying to sleep in a hospital is still there. Eddie sits up slowly from his spot, hunched and curled against Richie's leg, to raised voices about someone not being properly taken care of. It reminds him of his childhood. The days and nights spent drifting in and out of sleep to his mom yelling that his imaginary sickness was real, or the sickness she imagined of him not being like other boys and more like the gay men she was so scared of. Fun times.

Eddie's back feels like hell but he couldn't pull his hand away from Richie's while he slept. It could have woken him up and Eddie can still remember how crabby he would be when they were younger. He watches Richie for a moment and how peaceful he looks before gently shaking him awake. He still isn't a morning person, grumbling about coffee and helps him sit up slowly. He hands over a bottle of water , toothpaste , a toothbrush and the trashcan to spit in. "Hurry up I want to get the fuck out of Maine. We should be able to get to the first hotel by midnight, where I'm going to give you your first surprise." Richie pauses brushing his teeth to look up at him confused. He spits into the trashcan. "Surprise?" Eddie steals the toothpaste to brush his own teeth, looking at him with a small smile. "Wouldn't be a surprise if I told you what it is." Richie hums and they brush their teeth in silence. 

Eddie slips into the bathroom to change into something comfortable, shoving his dirty clothes into Richie's duffle bag. He puts their toothbrushes into two seperate zip lock bags and puts them into his duffle bag. "Ready to get dressed? I can grab a nurse if you need help.... Or I can help?" Richie's cheeks flush red and he shakes his head. "Maybe to get into the shorts and the sweatshirt." He tries his hardest to get dressed by himself. Richie doesn't even know why Eddie is back, doesnt he have a wife? Somewhere he needs to be other than glued to him? Not that Richie is complaining, but it still isn't sitting right. This doesn't feel real and he's waiting for that bright flash of light to send him dropping down into the caves under the sewer or was that still a part of the sewer? Filth under filth under filth.

He covers his face while Eddie helps him pull on his underwear, and then the shorts. He pauses to check under Richie's bandages to make sure they didn't disturb the stitches too much. He has some swelling that Eddie definitely plans on asking about. "Okay you big baby. Let's get your sweatshirt on. Move your hands. Richie?" Richie shakes his head and lowers his hands just a little looking up at him. "C'mon Richie. Don't you want to leave already?" Richie sighs and lowers his arms his face bright red. This is too much attention without him having to beg for it by annoying Eddie. This can't be real. This isn't real. The question is how much of dream Eddie does he get to spend tine with? Isn't dream Eddie technically Pennywise though? Richie stays silent eyeing him with the sinking suspicion that Pennywise is loving every second of this. 

Eddie chuckles, shaking his head and carefully works the sleeve over the cast, then works the sleeve over his other arm. "Raise your arms a bit." He raises them until it tugs at his stitches, maing him wince. "Shh. It's okay." There's that gentle voice. Eddie would never talk to him like that. Their gentle is calling eachother names and in that one timeline telling each other they fucked each other's moms.

Eddie moves in between his legs, taking off Richie's glasses and eases his arms just a bit higher to help pull the sweatshirt down. He wraps his arms around Richie hugging him close as he buries his face into Richie's curls. "I've been waiting to do this since you opened your eyes."

Richie buries his face into his chest and whines softly. "I want to go home." He can't wrap his arms around Eddie tight enough with the fingers and cast in his way. Let this dream last a bit longer. In the deadlights the longest he stayed was a week, but it's been a month plus, and Richie hasn't woken up with Eddie over him yet. Of course he was unconscious most of that time but still. Pennywise must be playing the long game this time and waiting for Richie to get really secure. 

Eddie pulls away enough to put his glasses back on, but stays close enough to keep his arms around Richie waiting for a nurse to bring the wheelchair in. Richie is looking up at Eddie, chin to the man's chest where the claw would have gone through. This can't be real. Please let this be real. Eddie's fingers are in his hair again and Richie closes his eyes. The lights flick on and Richie breathes in a sharp inhale burying his face in Eddie's chest his glasses pressing painfully into his cheeks. He tries to suck in air but wheezes out a weak exhale. Is this what Eddie feels like when he has his attacks? Fucking lights. He doesn't want this to be a dream... Or a fucking hallucination. Please let this be real. Eddie's clothes smell like comfort, like a home he will never be apart of, and the sad truth of that sends a pain right through his chest. 

"Hey could you give a warning next time. He has light sensitivity. Maybe say hey I'm coming into the room." Eddie, bless him, curls around Richie like he's something fragile, running his fingers through his hair. 

"It's okay Rich. It's okay." Whispered into his hair and Richie in his panic swears he feels the press of Eddie's lips against his scalp. Isn't there a song about wishful thinking? That was mostly about a breakup though wasnt it? He remembers singing along to the lyrics in his car when he was twenty one missing someone he couldn't remember. Oh fuck. Even when he couldn't remember this fucking asshole he had been pining over him. What a fucking sap. Eddie leans closer to his ear so it's just them in their own bubble. "Was it the dead lights? That reaction just now?" 

Richie has to take a breath just to steady himself, biting back the quick remark of wouldn't the clown know. What if this is Eddie? What if he really has half a lung and just spent weeks learning how to breathe with it? No, he'll play along for now, and when he drops into that ugly real world damp, exhausted, coming down , sore and more alone than he's ever felt in the company of his five friends his heart mourning the loss of Stan , then he'll show just how pissed he is. 

"Y-Yeah. Sorry Eds." He leans back looking at him with a goofy grin, his eyes crinkling around the corners , along with his nose scrunching up. Dream Eddie looks sympathetic but matches his smile with that stupid fucking dimpled grin that he hates to love in the moment. Eddie helps him stand being too gentle, too careful, too sweet while the nurse positions the wheel chair so he can flop into it, which he does awkwardly. Bending is painful. Breathing is painful. Living is painful. If this is living, it fucking sucks. 

He's wheeled outside Eddie close behind with the bags until he sets them in his lap like Richie is a fucking conveniently placed table or some shit. Oh, he's going to get his car. Richie can't wait to see what he's going to be manhandled into. More awkwardness between nurses and the man he has apparently had a big fucking gay crush on his entire life even when he couldn't remember. Part of him wishes he had continued on with his tour having never helped these fucking people that wormed their way into his heart. That's too cruel. He wouldn't take this back no matter how much saying goodbye is going to hurt. 

The nurse that he forgot was even standing there helped him stand as a black escalade pulled up to the curb. The nurse, Derrick, definitely had the manhandling down , his left underarm sore. "Thanks for helping us." Derrick just nodded. "Course. Kind of my job." 'No shit.' Richie thought. Eddie scrambled out of the vehicle and opened the passenger side. Derrick handed over the bags which Eddie set in the back, the helped Richie get settled in the passenger seat. 

Richie sighed heavily, moving the chair back as far as it would go and tried to get comfortable as Eddie closed the door. He puts on his seatbelt wincing when he has to twist a bit, and goes back to staring at nothing in particular, until Eddie crossed in front of the car.

Even from the profile he could see the black slime trailing down his chin , and when Eddie turned to flash him a smile, his teeth were coated in it. Then he blinked and the goo was gone. He's suddenly thirteen again looking down at Eddie's head in the mattress that vomited that black goo. 

He watches Eddie get into the driver's seat offering a forced smile when he raises a brow at him. Definitely still in the deadlights. Holy fuck, when is this going to end?

Richie focuses on his breathing as they pull out of the hospital parking lot, and drive down the road. He watches the buildings as they pass them , sometimes there's people in the windows or coming outside. As they leave Derry, Richie glances at the rearview mirror. Thousands of red balloons raise toward the sky popping when they reach a certain height. He squeezes his eyes shut. This isn't real. This isn't happening. He can't do this again. This is a fucking nightmare. 

"You okay? You're too quiet Rich." He jumps pulled out of his racing thoughts and looks over. "Yeah. My chest just hurts a bit, but it's nothing to worry over. I'm fine. Honest." He grins and pats Eddie on the knee. "Nothing to worry about Buddy." Lies. He just has to remain as composed as possible on the outside, until he has a moment alone. Then he can try to make sense of this. 

Eddie doesn't say anything else so Richie shifts a bit in the seat leaning back to try and get comfy. One town bleeds into the next and that one bleeds into another, and so on until Richie falls asleep.

\------

Lights. Darkness. Light. Darkness. Light. A soft groan and Richie shifts rubbing at his eyes, with the back of his hand. 

"Jeez Richie. You slept for nearly six hours. Are you sure you feel alright?"

He turns his head looking over at Eddie. "Mn. Blurry Eds. Glasses? Where are we?" 

Eddie runs a hand through his hair, and he melts into his seat a bit more. "We are in Albany, outside the Morgan State House Inn. I called yesterday and booked a room, if you're okay with sharing one. Did you want your own room?" He carefully puts Richie's glasses on. "Better?" 

"You booked a room? To share? Like ... Sleep in the same bed share a room? We... I... Yeah... We can share. Like a sleepover when we were kids but we're not kids... We're old men sharing a bed.... Are you sure?" Richie's face is burning and he's sure he's a lovely shade of red at this point, Eddie definitely notices by that smug little grin that just gets wider the more he fumbles over his words. 

"Great. It's late, and I need to stretch out. I didn't stop for anything to eat but we can order in? I'll help you get out." Eddie hops out locking the door behind him. 

He unbuckles and opens the door easing himself out carefully. He doesn't need anymore broken bones to go with the ones he has. Eddie is suddenly in front of him keeping him steady, with his hands on his sides. Christ. He was going to be the death of him. Richie feels like his heart stops for a moment and he chuckles nervously. What the fuck. What the fuck! SERIOUSLY, WHAT THE FUCK? Eddie is too close, too handsy, too fucking kind. This can't be real. 

Eddie smirks, and once he's sure Richie can stand on his own he grabs their bags. Richie follows after him, every step careful and sending pins and needles through his upper leg and pain through his middle. By the time they're inside he's wheezing trying to remember the breathing exercises the nurses helped him with. Eddie checks them in, and leads him to the stairs. Fucking stairs. 

Richie takes his time, and Eddie waits for him and by the time they're on the right floor Richie feels like he could sleep for a year. He stays quiet earning a few nervous Bambi glances from Eddie. He unlocks the room and Richie goes right for the bathroom, closing the door. 

He takes off his glasses setting them on the side of the tub and leans over the sink. He gags, a thin stream of black bile coming up. He has enough time for a short gasp of air before round two has his ribs complaining. He fights for air breath coming in short strained gasps as he stares in horror at the maggots writhing in the black bile, until he blinks a few times and it's just hospital food , and stomach acid. No black goo. No maggots. 

He catches his breath rinsing out the sink and then his mouth. Looking in the mirror was a mistake. Milky white stares back at him, his fingers drifting over the mirror in disbelief. This can't be real. This can't be good. Letting the water run while he pauses to use the bathroom, picks up his glasses and then he washes his hands turning off the water before he goes back into the room he didn't even pay attention to. Eddie's sitting on the bed looking at him confused and concerned. "I get carsick sometimes and the exercise didn't help. I think I'm okay now, I made sure that I didnt leave anything in the sink, so stop looking at me like that." Richie gets comfortable on the bed setting his glasses on the little bedside table. He doesn't need to see if it's just them.

"Do you still want food?" Richie shakes his head sticking out his tongue. "Then I'll order something tomorrow." Eddie moves to dig through his bags and pulls out two small wrapped up ... Those must be the surprise. Richie shifts looking up at him confused, as the Eddie blur moves close enough that their arms are pressed against each other. He's too close. Eddie sets the first wrapped thing on his thigh, Richie immediately picks it up to tear off the newspaper wrapping. 

R+E

The carving he did on the bridge. His fingers trail over the old wood glancing between Eddie and the wood. "You... You chopped it off the kissing bridge? When..." Eddie leans closer and chuckles. "When I couldn't sleep while you were still unconscious in the ICU. I panic cleaned my room at the inn and paced around your room for a good two hours. Mike found a saw and I cut it right off. He helped me sand down the edges so you wouldn't get splinters. He hands over the second gift and Richie just holds it for a second staring down at the R+E in disbelief. This definitely can't be real. Shaky hands carefully unwrap the second ... Oh. 

R

In a heart. 

He's hit with the memory of staring at this directly below his carving. He looks over at Eddie tears welling in his eyes his teeth sinking into his lower lip. This can't be real. Eddie just smiles softly and moves to straddle his lap. Not real. His hands are on his cheeks and Richie sucks in a sharp breath. Not real. He can't hold back the sob as he stops fighting the tears, his fingers tangling in Eddie's shirt. Eddie just gently cradles his face wiping away the tears with his thumbs leaning closer. "Cheesy." He's an inch from Richie's face and Richie is staring at Eddie's lips. If He ends up back in the deadlights he wants to know what this feels like at least once. He leans forward closing the distance, their mouths slotting together like puzzle pieces. Each little kiss has a huff of weeping between them.

It slows and grows gentle, and it's everything he's ever wanted. Eddie tastes like mint and chapstick and Richie curls his arms around him tugging Eddie closer earning a surprised noise. He takes the window of opportunity licking into Eddie's mouth deepening the kiss. Eddie kisses him back with need and want and Richie feels like he must have died and gone to some good place because holy fucking shit. Eddie's hands move to curl into his sweatshirt and hair and Richie moans into his mouth and the shit bites his lower lip tugging on it gently pulling away to catch his breath. 

Richie leans forward panting against Eddie's shoulder. Half a lung is a problem, he feels like he just finished running a marathon just from a fucking kiss. The air he manages to suck down comes with a burning sensation and he's reminded just how out of shape he was before he took an alien spider claw through the ribs.

He sniffles tucking his face into the curve of that neck pressing a trail of kisses down from the pulse point, lips and teeth dragging over skin. He leaves a dark hickey on his neck before he's pulled back by the hair.

Eddie attacks him. this kiss is rough, teeth and Eddie's fist curls tighter in his hair. Heaven. Hell. Fucking dead lights he doesnt care anymore. He kisses back pouring thirty three years of pining. Of nights crying wishing he could feel anything for girls instead of falling for Eddie. Of having to turn off music because the lyrics hit too close to home and he couldn't stand it. Of sleepovers sharing a bed just like this.

Thirty three years of want for this moment. His good hand slips under Eddie's shirt trailing his fingers lazily along his spine and Eddie arches into him. "Mmn. We gotta stop. Healing and you taste like puke." He's just as out of breath as Richie, but he steals another kiss, and another, and then Eddie's lips are moving to his neck and oh fuck payback is sweet. He sucks just under his jaw and Richie whines curling his arms around him tighter. 

Eddie just tucks his face into his hair when he's satisfied with all the marks he's probably left and they sit just lazily enjoying the moment to catch their breath. Eddie tries to move out of his lap but he pauses to kiss Richie again. It's a gentle slow kiss, that last far longer than Eddie probably wanted it to, but Richie finally lets him go and Eddie climbs out of bed gathering their toothbrushes, toothpaste and a bottle of water. He grabs another something but quickly hides it in his pants pocket like Richie can even see him on the other side of the room without his glasses. 

He grabs the small trash bin from by the door, and comes right back to bed straddling Richie again, and Richie's brain is still trying to unpack that he kissed Eddie and Eddie kissed back. He gets Richie's toothbrush ready and hands it to him, Richie brushes his teeth slowly while Eddie does the same looking at him with a small smile. 

Richie spits in the bin first then rinses out his mouth spitting again. He puts his toothbrush back in his zip lock bag leaning back to watch Eddie content and happier than he's ever been. Eddie spits and rinses after a moment setting the bin on the floor. He puts away his toothbrush setting both his and Richie's on the side table on his side of the bed. 

He curls his arms around Richie's neck pressing a kiss to his forehead, lips brushing his eyebrow, presses a kiss to his crows feet, cheek, jawline, corner of his lip, the tip of his nose , and then a gentle kiss on the lips. "Mmn. I can't remember the last time I was this happy." Richie sniffles and kisses him back wrapping his arms around him. "Tired. There's no way you're going to sleep under the blankets, huh? You'll kiss my dirty puke mouth, but you draw the line at crawling under the covers of a strangers bed. " 

Eddie shakes his head, and looks over at his bags. "I think I have a blanket in the car, or in my bag. Lay down and I'll look." Richie presses a gentle kiss to his jaw and hums. "Go. Can't make any promises that I'll still be awake when you come back." Eddie huffs, climbs out of bed, digs through his bags, then slips on his shoes. Richie slides down the bed until his head is resting against the pillows and closes his eyes. 

Eddie runs down to the car grabs the two blankets from the back seat locks up and jogs back up to the room, finding Richie out already. He covers him with one throw, and crawls into bed to lay tucked against his side with the other blanket wrapped around himself. He watches the rise and fall of Richie's chest while he wheezes softly until keeping his eyes open is a struggle.


	5. Road trip Baby! Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tooth rotting fluff. That's it that's the chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 😘❤🌈

Falling. Like cliff diving , but instead of Quarry water in it's greenish hue, the liquid he's submerged in is warm and red. He's treading a deep blood quarry, and on the cliffside is a giant Eddie, bleeding out of the hole punched through his chest. His mouth is full of sharp teeth stretched into an unnatural smile.

Knobby fingers close around his ankle while he stares up at Eddie in horror, and yank hard. It drags him down down down down down to the depths while Richie struggles and kicks and tries to hold his breath. Air! He needs air! The blood gets into his lungs and he's choking clawing at his throat as everything becomes walls of red, all he can see is red in every direction. He doesn't know which way is up. 

There's light from below him drawing his attention. Looking down was a mistake.

Teeth.

Thousands of teeth in a pulsating gaping cavern of a mouth with three lights that drift up slowly. He's reminded of old balloons that get sad and deflate a bit but still float, as they swirl slowly around him. He feels like he's floating as he continues to sink down down down the mouth doesn't do anything as he drifts down past the teeth, so many teeth, and the red becomes dimmer and darker a ombre of horror. He reaches out trying to stop the descending spiral into its gaping maw and cuts his hand on one of the teeth. 

It doesn't hurt. He can't tell if the wound bleeds the depths of this mouth are dark, so so dark. He feels as if he is experiencing sensory deprivation black in every direction except up. Up is a murky red that dims the further down he's dragged away from the dimming lights. 

\--- 

Warmth curled into his side. A weight on his chest. Soft light making the world red behind his eyelids until he opens them having to blink away the urge to go back to sleep. Not that he wants to go back into that can of crazy he calls his mind. They left the blinds open, but they're not on ground level so Richie isnt worried about people looking in on this private moment. Just thinking of holding Eddie like this in public makes his stomach do flips. 

Eddie's out, possibly drooling, his whole upper half glued to his chest with his face tucked into Richie's neck. His breathing is steady each exhale tickling the tender flesh and Richie turns his head pressing a kiss to Eddie's cheek. Richie lazily rubs small circles down Eddie's spine and back up remembering even as kids when Eddie was out he was OUT. It takes a lot to wake him up, kind of like when animals are in that deep place where you could wave them around and they wouldn't wake up, that's Eddie. 

Though the world around him is blurry, having Eddie right on top of him makes him notice that he isn't wearing the same shirt he was earlier, he's wearing Richie's from his bag, half his shoulder is exposed. 

cute cute cute cute cute!

He shifts forward, the muscles in his soft middle and the nearly closed wounds protesting the curl to press kisses along that patch of skin. Eddie groans burying his face into Richie's skin, as Richie continues the trail up to his cheek smiling against his temple.

"Mmn. Chee. Tired." And that's all he's going to get until Eddie wants to wake up, but his entire body is numb and he needs to move. 

"I know. We gotta move just a bit. I'm starting to hurt. Things are numb that I didn't know could go numb." He rubs Eddie's back gently. "I'll go back to cuddling, just move." 

Eddie huffs clearly annoyed by this but peels himself from Richie to lay on his back, while Richie chases his warmth by scooting down the bed a bit to curl into Eddie side resting his head on Eddie's chest. Eddie curls his arms around him and pats the side of his face until Richie shifts again to lay on top of him his casted limbs, arm tucked against Eddie's side and leg hanging off the side of the bed. 

Eddie's fingers find their way to his hair running through it , growing slower as he drits back off. Richie is up for the day, but he's perfectly happy staying like this, cheek pressed to Eddie's chest the steady thud under the flesh and cage of bones calming him. His fingers brush lightly over the arm curled over his head. If he could live in a moment forever this would be the one he would choose. 

Birdsong. He thinks of Stan and his widow wondering what he had been like at their age. He thinks of Mike spending his life in a town when he could have forgotten just like the rest of them in the safety of somewhere in Florida. The thought after that is how incredibly selfish it is to be glad he stayed just for him to have this moment. What a piece of shit he is that he's grateful his friend slowly sunk into madness for the sake of the rest of them and all the poor kids in Derry who get to grow up. Didn't the clown... When it was going to eat Bill in exchange for them going free.

Grow up and lead happy little lives until old age takes them back to the weeds. 

He thinks of all the things he should be doing had this shitty adventure not derailed that. He could have finished his tour, taped the special when he didnt fuck up the first joke. He thinks about how he should take better care of himself now that he's alive again, not just from the spike but emotionally. Nestled somewhere in between his childish mindset that came with the flood of not all bad memories of how he used to be, and this man he's become. He wants as much time as he can steal in this bubble of intimacy he never thought he could have and if he has to eat his vegetables to do that, he'll suffer through the loss of pizza and takeout. 

He isn't going to get rid of his ugly shirts but maybe he'll cut his hair or grow it out and let the curls take over. Maybe he'll wear the button up shirts actually buttoned in an attempt to look nicer if he gets to have someone like Eddie by his side. He deserves someone who doesn't look like a muppet that crawled out of the trash. 

He nuzzles further under the arm, into Eddie's chest pressing a gentle kiss to his sternum. He doesn't want to leave this room, from his a bit uncomfortable position with his casted limbs getting in the way. He's terrified that once they move the moment will be gone and Eddie will realize what they've done is a mistake and go back to brief touching like normal friends do. That he won't want him anymore , and it makes something squeeze and ache in his chest that he doesnt like. 

He takes a deep breath and tries to calm his nerves listening to the birds and Eddie's heart. Eddie wouldn't do that. He wouldn't. The fingers in his hair start moving again. 

"Can you please not think so loud? I can feel you getting worked up. Kisses for your thoughts?" 

Oh. Whoops.

A breathless chuckle and he rubs his face over Eddie's heart tilting slightly to look up at him. He props himself up on his good arm and drags his body up until he lays back down knocking the breath out of Eddie with his weight, as he tucks his face into Eddie's neck.

"It's nothing. Just thinking. Mostly about staying right here until I die if you'll let me." He can be brave, he can do this. "I don't want to let you go, but if you change your mind about.... I can be happy just having you in my life. I don't need anything else really. Just you ... Getting adorably worked up when I say stupid things to get you riled. I just .... I want you to know if you aren't feeling whatever possessed us last night that it's cool if you just want to be friends ... Unless that's awkward----" The fingers in his hair tug harshly. "----Ow! What the fuck was that for?" 

Eddie tugs again. "For someone smart you can be a real fucking idiot Richie! Move. Move!" Richie rolls off him looking like a scolded puppy until Eddie immediately straddles him, grabbing him by the shirt to get him to sit up, which Richie does.

Another kiss where they havent brushed their teeth but Eddie pushes the thought from his mind, putting all his frustration and want and need into the kiss. His arms curl around Richie's neck and Richie actually whimpers clutching him closer. "Dumbass." He mumbles into the kiss Richie chasing his mouth. It's gross, he can't help that thought as the kiss grows desperate tongues in eachothers mouths, teeth dragging over lips until Richie pulls away to wipe at his eyes. "Are you going to cry everytime we kiss?" 

Richie laughs wetly , flipping him off only to cup his cheek running his thumb over the scar in apology as he tries to get his emotions in check. "Probably. At least for a little bit. I just... I don't think this is real. I keep waiting for you to be like just kidding , or to drop back into Its cave and for this just to be a dead lights.... thing." 

Eddie's brows scrunch and Richie leans back into his bubble kissing the worry lines on his forehead. "Also don't you have a wife? What would she say about you sitting in my lap?"

Eddie might actually kill him. "I'm driving you home. I rented one room to lay in a bed with you. I've kissed your nasty mouth twice now and you tasted like puke the first time. I'm fucking sitting in your lap not wearing a wedding ring because I brought divorce papers home and told her our loveless marriage wasn't working because I'm in love with someone else. I've been in love with someone else. I'm in your fucking lap Richie. Fuck! I love you, but you are so fucking dense." He kisses him gently. "I quit my job. I'm literally driving you to LA to move in with you, because the entire time I went back to New York all I could think about was the idiot that saved my life almost dying for me. I thought about your stupid hands and how much I want to hold them. I thought about that dumb grin you get where your face goes all scrunchy and cute. I thought about how I used to buy ice cream just for us when we hung out with our friends. There's no one else for me trashmouth. I'm here because I want to wake up happy and kiss you when I want to. I'm here because I want to hear you laugh and do stupid voices , and take care of you when you dont feel good but not in the way my mother or wife did because I'm trying to be brave and live life for me the way I want to. My life without you and the other losers was empty and sad and boring and now I have you all back but more importantly I have you back Richie." 

Richie can't help the shocked noise, or the way the tears he just got under control are running down his face as he aggressively scrubs at his eyes. He isn't sad, in fact he's got that goofy smile stretched across his face as he sniffles and tries to say something but he can't. Eddie just traces little hearts into his sides waiting out the tears. Once Richie calms down a bit Eddie kisses him gently and grins. "You're such a softie under all that obnoxious." 

Richie giggles and it makes Eddie's chest feel funny in a good way. "What do you want for breakfast crybaby?" He trails his fingers over Richie's neck and presses light kisses over his face. Richie hums soaking up the attention and curls his arms around Eddie's waist pressing looking up at Eddie adoration and heart eyes clear in his expression. 

"Toast or a bagel and tea sounds good enough. What were you thinking of getting?" He hums softly curling his arms around Eddie tighter not wanting him to leave for anything at the moment even if he is hungry. "Are you ordering in? I haven't soaked up enough happiness yet if you have to leave." 

Eddie presses a kiss to his forehead and chuckles. He didn't think Richie would ever be this handsy. "Bagels sound good. I want you to have something in your system before we change the dressings on your wounds. Any aching from sleeping that long on your back?" He grabs his phone off the nightstand googling what's close by so he doesn't have to be away from Richie for too long. "There's a coffee shop close by, do you just want something from there? I'm sure they have something light."

"Could you do the cleaning the horror show first Doctor K? I don't want you to get sick from looking at it." He shifts sitting up and holds up his arms having some issue getting his wrecked side to not tug at the tender flesh too much. Eddie helps him out of the shirt and both of them wince when his shoulder pops. 

A sad look crosses over Eddie's face for a moment before he smiles pressing a kiss next to the bandages. "We should let it get some air, so I'm going to get you out of the bandages and then run to get food." He carefully unwraps the bandaging, and removes the gauze pads fingers brushing over the nasty scar staying away from the area that could still end up taking away Richie if it gets infected. 

Pulling away, Eddie crawls out of bed, dropping down on the floor. Digging through his open suitcase to pull out a sweater immediately tugging it on. He slips on his shoes and grabs the room key and his keys from by the door. He pauses to look back at Richie, who grins and waggles his brows. 

"I love you. Try to relax while I'm gone."

Closing the door to leave Richie alone was enough to get his anxiety to rest like a weight on his chest, but they had to eat something. 


End file.
